Saturday, July 01, 2006

Christian Laettner Red-Carded for England; Prince Charles too Drunk to Comment

Having Wayne Rooney, the England's only legitimate striker be the enforcer for the British team is like having Peyton Manning be the hard man for the Colts -- it's not very effective, and they're not going to score once he (inevitably) gets tossed. And "enforcer" is a bit generous -- Rooney's MO isn't to seek revenge for previous hits, but instead to randomly go after whomever has driven his troglodytic "brain" to fury, regardless of justification. So, once again, "Mickey" Rooney shows that while he may have a nose for goal, he has a brain for shite. The World Cup has already had a record number of red cards (ejections), so do you:

a) Play it clean and wait for a chance (hah!)
b) Flop like there's no tomorrow
c) Stomp some groins!

a) is a fairy tale, and b) is played out (Italia! Brasil! Argentina!) and c) is ...

You f*&^ing dolt. On the bright side, in 4 years, he'll still be a moron.

Photo Courtesy of ESPN!

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