Belgian Escalator Safety
With sleeplessness, salmonella from organic peanut butter, and all the other dangers of modern life, it's easy to forget the multitude of dangers present in our daily lives, even on seemingly harmless conveniences such as the escalator. But our friends at the Belgian Safety Dept. are working to keep awareness high. A translation for those not literate in Eurosignese:
1. If riding with a member of the Lollipop Guild, have him or her ride in front of you. No capering, please.
2. Don't try to shove your leg into the space between the sidewall and the moving steps. While it might appear a handy spot for a foot massage, it might actually injure you.
3. Please carry all dogs that have been amputated at the torso.
4. Ghosts should ride on the right side so that actual people can pass on the left without being weirded out by walking through the dead.
5. All strollers (prams to you Brits) should be attached at the waist.
6. In the name of all that is holy (in Belgium, that's nothing), do NOT wear floor-length scarves. These can inadvertently clean the filthy steps (or lead to yet another scarf-escalator hanging).