Break This Protocol

I don't want to bring up a sore point with my British readers, but Michelle Obama didn't break protocol by touching the queen*. EVERY American has the right to touch British royalty anytime they want, a right first implicitly declared in the Declaration of Independence, which states:

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the laws of nature and of nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation. If one party resists this separation, the remaining party has but no choice but to calcitrate buttocks until they realize their station and at warranted intervals thereafter.


Cheers to the First Lady** for standing up for our rights!

* I don't capitalize based on lineage.
** But I do for women I like and respect.