Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Champions League Diary: Bayern Munich-Barcelona 1st Leg, 2nd Half

45:30 - Munich apparently made a substitution, but I was in the shower. If it matters*, I'll mention it.

53:30 - Barcelona's Carles Puyol is carded for unsportsmanlike hair! Damn, this half is boring.

57:22 - I finally realize where I've seen Munich's tactics before: Homer Simpson's boxing career:
Moe: Okay, punching isn't your thing. But that's okay. You're not that kind of fighter. What you're gonna do is stand there while your opponent gets exhausted from over-punching.

65:21 - The German announcers have hit the schnapps and are now singing "Der Guten Tag Hop-Clop".

70:40 - With a great chance to narrow it to a 3-goal lead, the M√ľncheners go stylish with a tasty backheel to win some style points. But not, technically, a goal.

76:24 - Feeling a bit cocky, Barcelona uses one of their 3 substitutes to get steamed vegetables instead of a baked potato.

78:00 - The new Chad Vader videos aren't as good as the first season.

80:00 - One cool thing they do on Euro broadcasts is list the distance each player has run. Barcelona's Yaya just left the game having run 8.67km (about 5mi), while the team on average has run 8.72km.

82:00 - So it wasn't Toni that was the captain that got beaten for the crosses, it was Oddo. This would be easier if I had an HD receiver.

84:00 - Klinsmann and Hönness look like they have spent the last 80 minutes realizing that paella they had for lunch wasn't fresh.

86:00 - Chad Vader disappointed, but I thought Thor's Kitchen was funny.

87:20 - The Bayern 'keeper looked shell-shocked when hit in the face with a ball from about 10 feet away. Not a night going on his personal highlights DVD, I'm betting.

90:00 + 2:25 - Munich is apparently hoping that only 2nd half results count for Champions League standings, as "half-assed" would be a generous description of their efforts to reduce their deficit.

Game Over! Ugh. Apparently my NCAA talent of watching only blowouts carries over to soccer. One last question, why does the Joop! fragrance commercial still have an English voiceover? How much would it cost to record "Joop! fragrances for men," in German?

* i.e. if the sub scores 3 or more goals. Or is exceptionally mock-worthy -- a tough challenge on a team with Ribery, Toni and Schweinsteiger.

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