Saturday, April 10, 2010

An Open Letter To My Body Clock

Dear Body Clock,

First, I would like to thank you for your hard work and understanding when dealing with jet lag. I know that a few times a year, you must suddenly adapt to a 7 hour shift in your rhythms. This must be difficult and you have managed admirably. Second, I apologize for the large swings in day length over the last 4 years. You'd gotten used to more subtle changes, and the sudden arrival of 16 hours or more of daylight and then only 9 hours in the winter is another challenge you've risen to, year after year.

However, I feel that 30+ years of school and work is enough time to have grown comfortable with the following schedule:

  • Monday -- Wake up early to go to work.  We agree this sucks, but still.
  • Tuesday -- Wake up early to go to work.
  • Wednesday -- Wake up early to go to work.
  • Thursday -- Wake up early to go to work.
  • Friday -- Wake up early to go to work. After 5 days straight, I can understand occasionally letting this one slide, but please make an effort.
  • Saturday -- This is where we have a problem.  I can sleep late!  This means that there is NO need to pop open my eyes and make me feel I've overslept at SEVEN-FING-THIRTY. 
  • Sunday -- Wake up when I feel like it.  You're far more reliable on this one.

If you can't get a handle on this very reasonable schedule, I will have to go back to the only solution that seems to work -- the medicinal application of large quantities of alcohol.

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