Acceptable Status Updates (Good Taste):
- wants his wedding ceremony to be performed in the middle of a non-stop party.
- is doing everything possible to make us seem profitable
- 's schveltz is filled with boinkus
- don't get me started on the monkeys
- senses more complaining in you
- is not a spy!
- 's blood tastes like root beer
- isn't the one who forgot our 1-minute anniversary
- can't even find Mexico on the map
- has all the makings of a reality-TV star: hair-pullingness, delusions of grandeur, an insanely short fuse, catchphrases...
- has asked you NOT to call me at home after 11. Or before.
- knows what art is -- it's paintings of horses
- thinks elegance and attitude are the same thing
Unacceptable Status Updates (Being JT):
- is hosting the International Porn Awards
- 's schveltz is filled with boinkus
- thinks Hitler and Martha Stewart would've hated that wedding
- is dating Squeaky Fromm
- 's alarm clock died in a cock fight last night
- thinks marriage is finding her weakness, then viciously exploiting it
- thinks if you have more than 2 colors on a tie, you're "looking for a certain kind of bar"
- just wants to be accepted for who he is -- a sexual maniac
- wonders if you have any meth. Or meth?
1 comment:
Half my statues come from 30 Rock or They Might Be Giants lyrics.
conzinc - having the property or characteristic of being opposed to zinc.
That one was too easy.
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